Andy Warhol Said

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Andy Warhol said that in the media age each of us would have 15 minutes of fame. We would like to avoid infamy in our 15 minutes. Sexually addictive behaviors are secretive. When we imagine acting out in full view of the public including our friends, partners, family, coworkers, employers, and so forth, the urge to act out is quelled by healthy, normal, and corrective shame. This is the good shame, not the toxic shame. The good shame comes from realizing you are a messing up. The toxic shame comes from abusive experiences and victimization.

Imagine that you are at the brink of a slip. Your addict is whispering insistently in your ear that, "This will be alright" or "No one will know" or whatever the addict in you has to say. Get the setting and the circumstances in mind, whether that is logging onto a porn site, soliciting a prostitute, calling someone to arrange a sexual encounter, or whatever. Really see and know the scene as your ritual preparation to acting out is developing.

Now imagine that a television news crew is there with you. There is the reporter, the camera person, the sound person, and the producer. The camera is rolling and you know they are looking for a sound bite from you - a sound bite to be aired on the evening news along with the background material the reporter can dig up on you in the meantime.

Imagine that the news services pick the story up and it appears in print and electronic media all over the world.
Imagine the headlines and lead lines.
"Sex Addict Slips" - Says his addict said it was okay.
"Relapse 1 - Addict 0" - Rematch in the works.
"Today in Anytown USA, a sex addict acted out - Film at 11:00.

Now take a moment and think about how you would really like to spend your 15 minutes of fame. What is the next right thing to do that takes you in that direction?

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